DON'T BULLY OTHERS & HOW TO STOP IT - Myoma Myint Kywe

DON'T BULLY OTHERS & HOW TO STOP IT

Myoma Myint Kywe

“Hate is not conquered by hate:

Hate is conquered by love (Metta). This is eternal law.”

(Buddha has always advocated a peaceful and non-violent solution.)

-Buddha (BC 623-BC 543)

 “Know the enemy and know yourself; in a hundred battles you will never be in peril” “For to win one hundred victories in one hundred battles is not the acme of skill. To subdue the enemy without fighting is the acme of skill”.

 -孫子 Sun tzu (BC 544 - BC 496)-  

²⁷ “But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, ²⁸ bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. ²⁹ If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them.

Luke 6:27-29

We all have a right to feel safe and respected. We all have a right to live our lives free from violence. Violence, harassment and bullying can violate these rights. They can also impact on other rights, such as the right to education and the right to health.

Violence, harassment and bullying affect well-being and quality of life.

Victims can experience significant social isolation and feel unsafe. Bullying can lead to emotional and physical harm, loss of self-esteem, feelings of shame and anxiety, and concentration and learning difficulties.

Bullying is when people repeatedly and intentionally use bad words or bad actions against someone or a group of people to cause distress and risk to their well being.

Bullying is not the same as conflict between people (like having a fight) or disliking someone, even though people might bully each other because of conflict or dislike.

Bullying physically and orally can be defined in many different ways based on their race, sex, religion, gender, caste system, social status, and skin color. No bullying has to be physical. Most of the bullying is mental or verbal abuse. 

Bullying ranges from simple one-on-one bullying to more complex bullying in which the bully may have one or more number who may seem to be willing to assist the primary bully in his or her bullying activities. Bullying in school and the workplace is also referred to as peer abuse. A bullying culture can develop in any context in which humans interact with each other. This includes school, family, the workplace, home, and neighborhoods.

 

Physical abuse is an act of a person involving contact of another person intended to cause feelings of physical pain, injury, or other physical suffering or bodily harm.  In most cases, children are the victims of physical abuse, but adults can also be victims, such as in a domestic context. Alternative terms sometimes used include physical assault or physical violence, and may also include sexual abuse.

Physical abuse may involve more than one abuser and more than one victim.

Psychological abuse, also referred to as emotional abuse or mental abuse, is a form of abuse characterized by a person subjecting or exposing another to behavior that may result in psychological trauma, including anxiety, chronic depression, or post-traumatic stress disorder. Such abuse is often associated with situations of power imbalance, such as abusive relationships, bullying, and abuse in the workplace.

Mental abuse is also known as psychological abuse or emotional abuse. Mental abuse is sometimes overlooked because there aren't any visible bruises or marks on the victim; however, mental abuse can severely affect the victim.

  

Bullying can happen anywhere. It can be in schools, at home, at work, in online social spaces, via text messaging or via email. It can be physical, verbal, emotional, and it also includes messages, public statements and behaviour online intended to cause distress or harm (also known as cyber-bullying). But no matter what form bullying takes, the results can be the same: severe distress and pain for the person being bullied.

Face-to-face bullying (sometimes referred to as direct bullying) involves physical actions such as punching or kicking or direct verbal actions such as name-calling, nickname-calling, and insulting.

Covert bullying (sometimes referred to as indirect bullying) is less direct, but just as painful. It means bullying which isn’t easily seen by others and is conducted out of sight, such as excluding people from groups or spreading lies or rumours. Because it is less obvious, it is often unacknowledged by adults.

Cyber bullying occurs through the use of information or communication technologies such Instant Messaging or chat, text messages, email and social networking sites or forums. It has many similarities with offline bullying, but it can also be anonymous, it can reach a wide audience, and sent or uploaded material can be difficult to remove. Most people who cyber bully also bully off-line.

Whether on the school playground or in the neighborhood park, children sometimes find themselves the target of bullies. When that happens, these bullies can:

·        Frighten a child

·        Make a child feel less important

·        Destroy and damage a child's material happiness

·        Cause bodily injury

·        Cause ongoing mental health problems

Avoiding a bully can be one reason your child may not want to go to school. Perhaps, he is being forced to give up his lunch money to a bully. He might also be fearful of physical harm. If you suspect a problem like this, you need to take action to ensure your child's safety and well-being.

Bullies are NOT courageous, but cowards!  

Teachings of Buddha tell us that patience is the cure to anger and belligerent. Patience is the BEST medicine. Patience is a virtue. The important thing is avoiding a fight back at normal case and small matter. We do not try to increase and enlarge any small problems.  

“Patience is the key to success.
Patience is the key to love.
Patience is the key to happiness.  
Patience is patient and kind.
Patience is forgiveness.
Patience is goodwill and long suffering. 
Patience never gives up. 
Patience never loses faith and hope. 
Patience endures every circumstances.” 

We ought also to patience one another mutually. But patience is not POSSIBLE all time in some situations.
Patience is only possible within the limit we are able to be patient.

Everyone needs to study any martial arts such as karate, bando, kung fu, taekwondo, shaolin, boxing, etc.

All martial arts are very useful. Many parents turn to karate to help build their child’s self- confidence and self- control. It is good idea.

Karate martial art has an extensive children’s program that is designed to develop your child not only physically, but also mentally. Life skills are embedded to help prepare your child for life ahead.

Karate can build your child about focus, goal setting, courage, patience, perseverance, self-respect and self- control will help them learn to make the right decisions in life.

Valuable life skills your child will learn through martial arts include – self- confidence, self-control, self-discipline, Focus, Goal Achievement, and Leadership.

In addition to good for health, control body weight, physical fitness, and reduce cholesterol levels. Playing karate can help people achieve fitness goals related to weight loss, muscle development and fat reduction because of the physical activity involved.

 

Karate is important for good health is that participating in sports can encourage positive lifestyle decisions.

How can you or your child do to stop bullies?

·        You should teach yourself and your child to PATIENCE / tolerance to bullying person as much as you/he/she can. Patience is the BEST medicine.

·        If yourself or you know or see your child or someone who is being bullied, you should report to parent, teachers, siblings and police officers soon. Run as quickly as you can to an adult, parent, siblings, teachers, and police man and tell them what happened.  

·        You should teach yourself and your child to walk away (to leave here and move on very rapidly from there) or Fight Back against bullies a stick-wielding such as spray paint, itching powder, and a small explosive firecracker.

·        If you are being bullied, you should talk to nearest someone you know well and trust; they will give you much needed help/support and will often have suggestions you hadn't considered for helping with the situation.

·        You might feel more comfortable taking a friend with you to talk to the bully or when seeking help. If you feel you might get too nervous to speak, write down what you'd like to say on paper or in an email.

·        If you feel safe and confident, you should approach the person who is bullying you and tell them “STOP bullying to me, please” that their behaviour is unwanted and not acceptable.

·        If you are being bullied while at school, it is a good idea to seek help from a friend, or to report to a teacher or counsellor to see if they can help.

·        If you are being bullied at work, you should report to senior officers and your workmates.

·        If you are being bullied at home, you should report to your parent or uncle or aunt.

You can only use that amount of force that's necessary to stop the threat of harm. You do NOT use deadly force.

The other person lunges at you or tries to punch you, kick you, you should protect (counter attack) yourself by fighting back. If you fight back and the other person gives up or is unable to defend himself, you do NOT continue to hit him - it's an unreasonable use of force.

If the other person doesn't come close enough to you to actually hit you and he doesn't have a weapon and he starts to walk away, you can't chase after him and hit him - the threat of harm to you isn't imminent.

These are very simple examples and very general rules. The facts and circumstances of each case and the laws in your country will determine if you acted properly in defending yourself.

The keys to remember are: You can use only that amount of force that's necessary to protect yourself from immediate harm.

True karate is this: that in daily life one's mind and body be trained and developed in a spirit of humility, and that in critical times, one be stand up in the truth to the cause of justice. We must stand for truth and righteousness.

Bullying in children on the road

In order to stop the cycle of bullying, kids/children should be taught to always report to teachers, police man and elders when they are a victim of it, and to report every incident. If your children have been victims of bullying, you may be asking yourself, “Why do bullies target them?” While there is no single answer to this question, it is true that sometimes bullies target other kids simply because they look like an unaware or unprepared target. This is where self-defense techniques come in.

First of all, you should teach your child to PATIENCE / tolerance to bullying person as much as he/she can. Patience is the BEST medicine. But patience is impossible always useful. The important thing is avoiding a fight back at normal case and small matter. We do not try to increase and enlarge any small problems.

孫子 sun tzu said “Know the enemy and know yourself; in a hundred battles you will never be in peril” “For to win one hundred victories in one hundred battles is not the acme of skill. To subdue the enemy without fighting is the acme of skill”.

This is the BEST way. But “Be ready to block, fight back, kicks and punches to bully person”.

One of the best ways to prevent bullying is to be sure your children have a healthy self-esteem and carry themselves with confidence. Being self-confident involves having good posture, walking with a purpose and making eye contact with those around them.

Second step, you should teach your child to walk away or Fight Back against bullies a stick-wielding such as spray paint, itching powder, and a small explosive firecracker. (Don't insult to opponent or become angry with him or her. Just stay calm and ready to move) (If there is at very far from school, at far from home, may be on the street, if your children learn karate enough already, he/she can fight back to bully person. Real Karate self-defense is the use of physical force to counter attack an immediate threat of violence. Karate has many counter attack methods and full contact karate (knockdown karate). A martial arts is not for the skill to fight back the bully, it's for the self-confidence). (Your child can defend and counter-attack (fight back) themselves only if you can't go away instead walk away). You've got to give your child the confidence to stand up to the bully.

At school, your child should then go straight to the principal's office.  On the road, seek to police to complain, and call parent is the best idea.

Most all schools have a zero-violence policy. If a child fights, that child gets sent home. Tell your child that when it comes to bullies, you expect him or her to fight back and that you will support your child's actions 100%.

Many kids never fight back against bullies because they are afraid they'll be in trouble with their parents, and they allow the bully to harass them for many years.

Good policy

·        Patience is better than fight back.

·        Walk away or to leave here is better than fight back.

·        Friendship is better than fight back.

·        Forgiveness is better than fight back.

·        Self- protection (counter attack) is better than surrender.

·        Fight back (counter attack) is better than surrender.

 "Targets" of bullying are also sometimes referred to as "victims" of bullying. Children need to know when they have the right to hurt someone to stop that person from hurting them. At child power, we teach that counter fighting is a last rely – when you are about to be harmed and you cannot leave or get help. Learning physical self- defense helps most children become more confident.

https://www.humanrights.gov.au/what-bullying-violence-harassment-and-bullying-fact-sheet